Relationships

A strange metaphor about city life came to my mind the other day as a result of many discussions with my friends who live in the suburbs. It needs some background in order to understand. I usually don’t blog about my personnel life, but I will do a little bit here to explain the metaphor. I was born in a big city in the former Soviet Union and spent my childhood and youth there. I lived in the center of the city and most of my friends lived nearby; I walked to school, the grocery store and the local movie theater. When I immigrated to the United States, I ended up living in suburbs like many of my compatriots. I spent about 15 years living in Bethesda. Many of my readers know that Bethesda is a suburb of Washington DC and considered to be one of the most prestigious places to live. We lived in the heart of Bethesda and it was very convenient. The metro was in walking distance, the ride to the downtown DC was only 20 min. In many big cities this would not be a suburb at all; but since DC is not that big, it is a suburb. I went to Bethesda for lunch on Saturday. The parking lots in all their glory are still there I had lunch in my favorite restaurant: Bethesda became even nicer since I left.

When my daughter graduated from high school and went off to college, we had no reasons to stay in Bethesda, but we did mostly due to inertia. The Bethesda period of my life was continued until a fortunate visit of my old friend from San Francisco. During her stay with us in Bethesda we visited her cousin who lived near Logan Circle The neighborhood was not as nice then as it is now, but I observed how people live there and it felt lively and familiar. It reminded me of being young and living in the city I suddenly felt like a stupid bird in the cage with an open door who had forgotten how to fly. I came to United States all the way from the Soviet Union and I was paralyzed and could not move from Bethesda to DC. We rapidly moved to the city and our only regret was that we wasted a few extra years in the desirable suburb.

After settling down and getting accustom to the new place I realized that my life had radically changed. I spent some time thinking why there was such a difference in my being. I knew it was related to city living but did not understand why I felt so different. The lifestyle I had in Bethesda was urban: I didn’t drive to work; we had a lot of restaurants within walking distance and an artsy movie theater two blocks away. So what made such a difference? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I now live in a beautiful area and I do have some esthetic sensibilities. Although I have lived in DC for several years, I keep walking around and taking pictures. The people are much more diverse and there are more places to walk. But there was something else which I could not put my finger on. I think I know now. It is a relationship.

This is how it works. When you live in a suburb your relationship to the city is very similar to your relationship with a neighbor. If you like the city, you go there often, if you don’t you go there only if you have to. Same thing with a neighbor, if you like your neighbors you visit them often, otherwise only if you have to. You know a few things about the city: historical places, monuments and museums, well known restaurants. These are places which the city is ready to show to visitors. The same about a neighbor, you see a nice house and well taken care of lawn. You know that they have a couple kids, a dog and go for a bicycle ride on Sunday. What you don’t know if they love each other. What do they dream about? You don’t know their secrets or for that matter where they keep an extra rolls of toilet paper. Not that all of that is interesting, but since there is a lot you don’t know you cannot tell.
When you live in the city it is a different connection. Your relationship to a city is like your relationship with your spouse. You live with him (her). You know or you hope you know everything. You have strong feelings which are not at all similar to the feelings you have for your neighbor (unless you are having an affair, but this is a different story). You see the city evolving around you. You get happy when things are improving and upset when things get worse. The city became a family member – it is part of your life.
Where does such intimacy come from? The best answer I’m able to find is: because the city is a living organism, but the suburbs are somewhat artificial creations. The type of attachment I have can only be developed to something which is alive. I never felt that Bethesda was a part of my life. It was just a place I lived. The place was convenient, well served, with a very wealthy and educated population. But I didn’t miss it for a second when I left. I lived there for more than 15 years and did not develop roots which could keep me there. Bethesda has a lot going for it. It mimics the city life nicely. It has a small downtown with a few walking streets with restaurants stores and even an occasional art gallery. The condo complex where I used to live is just one block from there: But OMG how similar it is to Reston or Rockville. These little downtowns are so impersonal and so much alike. It is very difficult to develop a relationship with a place like that. I can easily come up with four types of suburbs and majority of them will fit nicely in one of these types. So here we go: wealthy/liberal, wealthy/conservative, not so wealthy/liberal and not so wealthy conservative. The details can be filled in so fast for each type, I won’t even bother.
Cities on the other hand cannot be categorized that quickly. I cannot come up with defined city types, because they have personalities which have organically developed over time and since they all have different histories; their personalities are very different. These personalities are changing depending on the economic conditions, city demographic and who knows what else. But each time period leaves marks and adds new details which all together create a complex character which makes the city alive. It is only natural to be a part of it, develop roots, and grow together; just like with a spouse…

Season Opening: Summer

It is the third day of a three day weekend. The grocery shopping, laundry and preparation for dinner are all done. It is hot outside; a heat wave pushed the temperatures up into the low 90s. There are choices to make: to stay inside and enjoy a lazy day under AC reading and internet browsing or venture aimlessly outside and observe early summer in the city.
I decided to get out. Because of my office job I try to use every opportunity to spend time outside. I’m not a big nature lover, but I love city living and urban hiking. I do have several qualms about nature which I built over time to excuse my relative indifference towards it. My main objection to wild nature is that there are no people or any trace of human existence. I understand that real nature lovers find that attractive but in my view it is people and their activities and creations are the most interesting and fascinating things in the world. Unless you believe in God, natural landscapes have no ideas or design behind them and are randomly appointed based on location and weather condition. The beauty of these landscapes is attributed by people who see patterns and color arrangements which please them and give meaning to randomness.
On the other hand, the urban landscapes in their better representations are full of ideas and connect nature with human habitat in creative and fun ways. The human spirit is present in these landscapes even when streets are empty, but of course it is people who really bring city to life. It is all for them.

So let’s take a look what is out there?
Here is the hot afternoon sun illuminate the street as I walk out of the building
and lighting up the top of the tree What a fabulous idea to plant the tree with bright burgundy leaves in front of the grey building!
Because of the heat the streets are empty
but full of human playfulness expressed in lively building colors
details of the doors and porches
sudden lion wall relief and cute flower arrangement next to the basement window
The way people use architecture and set up little urban landscape is thoughtful, delightful and brings a joy if you choose to pause and see

As I reached the 14 St I suddenly realized that I’m not the only crazy one who got out on the heat –there are other people and it looks they are having fun Here what is going on:
The crowd is lively: young, dressed to have fun and embrace the heat:
The local mini fashion show is in full parade with cute sandals
and hats:


and summer dresses:

Completed with a live band
and positive behavioral support staff it is a perfect opening for the Summer in the City show.

Three Days in London

The last time I visited London was 12 years ago. Patrick and I were there for a week in early autumn. We were not impressed. Yes, the museums were fascinating, but not surprising so; something you would expect from the country which at one point owned half of the world. The Rosetta Stone and Elgin Marbles in British museum are real world wonders. But the tourist attractions were not enough to bring me back to London. The city was not appealing; people didn’t look attractive, the eating experience met the existing stereotype of British food, the best theater performance was actually an American import. There were no reasons to come back to this overpriced and charmless city.
This year it happened that my school friend, who lives in Moscow was going on a business trip to London. I really wanted to see her and travelling to Moscow is not an option (one day I might write about that). She invited me to come to meet her in London. I took a few days off and arrived in London on a mid-April morning. The taxi took me from the Paddington Station to hotel near St. Paul Cathedral. The driver took a scenic route and I immediately realized that something was different. This was not at all the city I remembered. I’m not sure why this happened. But the only reasonable explanation is that I had changed not the city of London. I knew I was going to love it this time.
As soon as I shook off the travel fatigue, I left the hotel for a walk and lunch. I was a bit concerned about where to eat, since my preliminary internet investigation on eating in London was not fruitful. Right next to the hotel were plenty of little eating places. To my surprise all of them looked pretty good. I selected a little café called Apostrophes (http://www.apostropheuk.com/) mostly because I saw through the window that they serve Illy coffee. I walked inside and the place looked, smelled and felt right. My instinct didn’t fool me and the first meal was a huge success.
A superb lunch provided a strong support for the initial positive impression. The next destination was a book store for a detail city map and maybe a travel book. I decided to skip the book after brief review of the available selection, as the interesting books were pretty thick and, in addition to my Nikon, would severely limit how much I could march around the city. I discussed it with the store clerk and he offered a nice compromise: basically just a detail map with the short description of major attractions. It turned out to be a great choice – almost no weight and I didn't get lost once!
I hit the streets and they were lovely! The people, the buildings, store windows, old telephone booths; everything was full of charm. One of the major attractions was that it is so varied and eclectic: people of different races, restaurants with food from around the world, buildings from different eras. On the top of that, there were the gardens all around the city in full glory of blooming April.

I could not stop taking pictures.

The Fleet Street doesn't look at all like in Sweeny Todd, but still exciting and full of life:

And the combination of old, not so old and new:





The next day my destination was the museum of Albert and Victoria. I don't even know where to start with that. How about the logo. The modern designers still have a thing or two to learn from the old masters!

A few years ago at the NY Metropolitan museum I saw a textile exhibit from there and it was very memorable. Back then I thought that if I was ever in London again I will check it out. With museums I have a personnel limit of two hours; this is how long I can enjoy a museum without diminishing the experience by being overwhelmed with information and images. Walking around I kept thinking that I needed at least three or four visits here to get a good idea about the collection. It reminded me of my trip to St. Petersburg about thirty years ago (OMG!). I spent one week going to Hermitage every day.
Just to illustrate the variety of decorative arts in the collection here are a few samples:
The metal work:


The lace:

The art nouveau garden sculpture:

The midlevel grotesque in sculpture (never seen that before!)

And the marvelous fashion exhibit by Yamomoto with amazing commentary:


After that I went to a lovely Japanese place for lunch with this view from the window.

How could I possibly have not seen the charm on the first time? I’m pretty sure that the one thing which definitely changed in London is food and for me that is a make or break factor.









The first shopping expedition started at the Liberty. This is my favorite store in London. It is housed in the magnificent Tudor building constructed from the timber of two ships. I never bought anything there and most likely never will, but the clothes and the setting of the store brings one as close as possible to a museum experience. The joy of gorgeous rooms with fireplaces, stained glass windows and the exquisite garments was extended by a fashion event where champagne and hors d'oeuvres where served to the customers and visitors like me ;)
The Liberty experience warmed my appetite for shopping and the next day I decided to go to more democratic place - Oxford Street.
I rapidly got disappointed and turned on to Bond Street for more visual pleasures. As usual I prefer the luxury window shopping to the affordable real one. It is more enjoyable, the merchandize is so much better, the people watching is more fun and the savings are amazing due to the fact that I can’t buy anything :)
Just take a look at these lovely windows:
















Or the London dandies at the street café:






















Or the windows of the very expensive jewelry store decorated perfectly right






















for the customers modest enough to cover the hair





















but flaunt enough to parade their wealth with Louis Vuitton head scarf :)

















The Refined Madam drink at Waldorf Hilton http://www.worldclassuk.com/ViewCocktail.aspx?c=2871&b=0

was the finest finishing touch!
Is it fun? Viva London! The next time with Patrick!